welcome to the quantum ghetto

jack fell diaries 005

Days on north when the barometric pressure is just so and the magnetic fields round the unit go proper fuzzy I seek out the acoustic vortex near the top of the male hall where I can listen to and track a dozen conversations at once. Shut my eyes and let the voices wash like I’m floating in a sense dep tank till I’m hovering just overhead and the game is on. Identify and separate the voices into staff and not staff. Shadow and corporeal. Psychotic and suicidal. Astral and unbound. Not mine and mine and never not yours. 

Did you hear the lady in one oh six died at the ER.

Which one.

The math teacher said she was an African queen. The one spoke in a fucked up french accent. Found her on second shift bleeding out in her room.

The one on fertility pills from the dark web.

Nah that was like a caribbean accent from Barbados or someplace. 

But she was from north Memphis. 

What I’m saying. 

That jank fertility potion killed her, made her start hemorrhaging. The accent was pure psychosis.

Brain trauma maybe. 

But you know some countries in Africa like Rwanda, folks do talk french.

Dude not the point. The bitch wasn’t french or african, just plain old psychotic american. 

I’m pretty sure Rwanda is called Zimbabwe now.

Man yall both retarded that was Rhodesia.

Never heard of it where is that.

Fucking Africa. Used to be.

Differently abled.

What. Fuck that shit.

Differently abled don’t mean fuck all less you’re talking about a two-legged dog with his ass end attached to a skateboard, in which case do you think that dog give a fuck what you call him.

If anything that dog want a cool nickname like Jet. 

Nascar.

Same goes for special. Used to mean special. Now it's a motherfuck insult. Special as fuck just means extra retarded. 

Retarded is a perfectly good word. 

I’d rather be called retard than special. 

Word. Got to own that shit.

Reclaim the retard little brother. 

Uh huh you start calling your peeps my retard, sing it loud and proud.

Little dude you sorry as Mario stuck in a corner gone buggy can’t go up down sideways.

How the fuck you still ain’t figured out you right click the wrong reality drops you out the game into a sub level. 

Nah I’m just checking on the babies. They all sleep.

Just sayin you open pandora’s box and fuck around with words and what shit means and where it’s going is the molesters are next up on the alphabet color wheel.

I’m gonna make you my bottom bitch boy. 

Stick it in my little dick. 

I got underwear older than you motherfucker. 

Damn son you ain’t killed that invisible nigga yet.

Ain’t studyin his monkey ass.

They was driving fastly. 

I never did fuck that retahd boy. 

How do I sign up for a crazy check.

I ain’t with that gay shit. 

Mama got demons. 

Soon as you fall asleep I’m gonna sew your eyelids shut uh huh. 

Every last one of us walking round somebody else’s head like a silent movie on a loop. 

Yeah dig that. 

Bullshit them kids is trash. Always got to fuck wit mah mailbox. Tamper wit mah garden. Like muhfuck rabbits blown up everwhere. 

Come on let it go pop. All good. Don’t worry about those kids.

It ain’t even a real mailbox. 

Muhfucker. I see how it is. Uh huh you want a nigga do a lil dance shine yo shoe and eat shit cos you got to be the big house nigga. 

That how it is huh. 

No suh. 

I told you pop lay off the ebonics bruh. 

Nah fuck you trick.

Need you to step back in your room pop.

The hell you say I know that game. Put a nigga in his room shoot him up wit monkey juice. How a man gonna live in a cage. Look at this shit.

I see this room fucked up. Maybe why you never have a roommate.

Don’t want none these sorry ass convicts in my shit no goddamn way.

Alright now pop goodnight bossman.

What up gentlemen you cool.

Uh huh yessuh we good.

He seem pretty alright that whiteboy. 

The fuck yall lookin at this ain’t no disco just take yoh ugly caveman ass back down the hall.

Goodnight pop.

Damn don’t nobody put stank on the word nigga like pop. 

For real bruh. He reach in touch your heart with that stinkfinger.

Them neighbor kids in the real must be terrified. 

Like snoop had a baby with freddy kruger then did some reverse benjamin button shit to him on top and bout to fall down if the wind blow crooked.

Alright gentleman.

Alright Cap.

The only difference between you and me is I still have a key to the building. 

Ever notice how when you play a first person shooter your guy don’t spend no fucking time twiddlin his phone like it’s the holy rosary. Ain’t got time to scroll through liking pics he don’t like cos he got aliens and monsters and shit coming out the shadows trying to kill his ass. All he got time for is to swipe left left left with that rail gun. 

I’m goin rogue swear to god. Dark knight. I’m gonna get up this hospital’s corrupt ass and monkeywrench it from inside.

You are on camera every minute every breath. 

Goddamn phones listen to your thoughts.

Birds aren’t real. 

Jesus the lamb the light the way. 

The zombie origin story.

What do you say was Mary the original daddy’s girl or girl with daddy issues.

No question the bitch got issues.

Whoa yall talkin bout Magdalene or the other one. 

The virgin.

Ah yeah virgin baby mama got to have daddy issues for real.

Mary Magdalene though. She do seem kinda slutty herself.

Nah that just bad publicity. The other bitches talking shit.  

Don’t mean fuck no way. Daddy girl can be just as slutty as girl with daddy issues if she want to roll that way. 

I mean fuck dude look at the apple logo. It’s a motherfuck clear white apple with a bite took out of it. Who the fuck was it you think took that bite. 

Anybody tells you up front they got a policy about don’t be evil you know that motherfucker is a nazi. That some reverse psycho antichrist shit.  

Nah that was the google I think.

I mean we tamper with reality all the time what the fuck did we think would happen.

Uh huh same as that stuck net worm.

They released that sneaky lizard fuck into the nanosphere like a frankencentipod from hell and now it just slither round and round night and day just gobblin up data suckin it up til it fit to bust and now the machine got everything about you up its ass from your childhood memories the name of your first dog name your fourth grade teacher your favorite ice cream baseball team your favorite mutant x-man to your favorite goddamn sex position. 

Stuxnet.

Reverse cowgirl.

Man shut the fuck up.

Also the hole in the universe is actually located underneath the Denver airport. 

Uh huh true that I’ve traveled through that black hole many times. 

Dude look this way. If the shit is a simulation then gotta be a way to reverse engineer the code and level up and keep going up til you get to level X.

But what is level X.

Purgatory I reckon if you’re a christian.

Fuck that christianity is the reason we got stuck with linear time in the first place.

The hell you mean.

Everybody we been doing genocide against for the past thousand years like the indians and aboriginals those cats lived in harmony with the earth and those motherfuckers believe the big spin is cyclical. 

Not fucking linear.

Uh huh the hindus and buddhists the same.

The poor you mean. The meek.

Nah man what I’m saying is hebrew and arabic are written on the page right to left. 

Right to left is still linear ain’t it.

The motherfuckers are traveling backward through time. The fuck they expect. 

If we design our own purgatory what you think it’s gonna look like.

Like this place. Like a FEMA death camp under walmart.

Flat earth hollow earth the fuck is the difference.

Muhfuck stealing lyrics out my head. 

El Chapo coming to get me. 

If gravity can bend light how could it not affect the data stream.

The word rainbow got lucky charmed into icky freaky my little pony dust.

Tell you the difference right now bruh. You fucking a sister and fuck up like forget to get the milk or be nice to some bitch she hate. Or look too long too hard at her girlfriend. 

Or even if you didn’t do nothin. 

Don’t matter she already decided. 

Sister bout to get loud. She gonna clown. You feel me. Sister gonna make a scene at church, the checkout line, in front of your friends. Where the fuck ever.

The now is the only reality. The only thing certain. 

Uh huh the future is unfolding refolding endless origami outcomes and the past is mutating behind us still visible like smoke hanging on the air.

She don’t give a fuck. 

Uh huh sister love to make a scene for real. 

But you fucking a white girl and do the same shit, she gonna mope around and give you the silent treatment. 

That shit is nice. Love me the silent treatment. 

But look bruh don’t never trust a white girl named Destiny.

Etymology of rainbow traces back to grains of sand in Latin. 

Who the fuck speak Latin. 

Exactly.

Every day I wake up with a new data stream running in my head. The outside world ain’t changed. Not so you’d notice. But I notice. 

Either god created man in his image or we created god in ours.

Which one more scary.

Depends who you believe cooked up the notion of original sin.

We all just disembodied operators playing the same fucked up video game round and round like characters in somebody else’s dream.

Life on the North be like this. 

Like what.

Like you put a thousand dollar surf watch on the table and society just broke down to a pawnbroker and a surfer plus the watchmaker and his schizophrenic nephew and three of them ready to fight to the death for that watch. 

Nephew don’t give a fuck.

End of the day every breath we take every fucking move we make is involuntary.

I mean how exactly the dogma of a big bang different from all the mythology we came up with in the before times. 

Every motherfucker up and down this hall is an NPC but the schizophrenics. 

I don’t like being touched. Don’t want nobody to love me.

But that shit normal yeah.

If we ever become beings of pure light it will take our minds forever to adjust to that shit.

Uh huh baby welcome to the quantum ghetto.

Open your eyes and gather reality slow but sure. Like a pocketful of sand. I can show you fear in a handful of that shit. Check your watch and breathe. Find yourself standing at high noon atop the male hallway on the north unit. Bodies flail and thrum and wreck the water like sharks chasing blood. Josephine is talking to me in midair. I can hear her voice in my bones and dreams. For fuck sake that’s your radio snap out of it.

Jack come in. 

Hey. Joe what’s up.

Meet me at the ambulance bay. We’re going on a run.